No one likes making mistakes. Our culture emphasizes
perfection, so mistakes are seen as failures, not as learning experiences.
Nervous people go a step further by fearing the possibility of making mistakes.
Just the idea of forgetting to sign a
check, accidentally offending someone, buying the wrong gift, and so on can
make our hearts race, our palms sweat, and our minds whirl.
Great thinkers have long recognized that making mistakes is
key to learning. We should not fear what is human nature. Of course, mistakes
make us uncomfortable—that’s only human. But Dr. Low advises us to have the courage to make mistakes. Notice in my
list of mistakes we fear that I did not mention anything major. Anxious people,
much to our surprise, usually perform with rational thought and calm intent
when making life’s big decisions. Instead, it’s the daily trivialities that
throw us into a tizzy. Yet Dr. Low (1997) notes, “Mistakes made in trivial
performances are trivial themselves, and their possible consequences are just
as trivial and not to be feared” (p. 249).
Removing the burden of perfection is incredibly freeing. The
next time you feel yourself tightening up over the need to be perfect, take a
deep breath and remind yourself that it is indeed OK to make mistakes, that you
have the courage to make mistakes. This
realization has helped me in all aspects of my life. And when you “lower your
standards” for yourself your performance will actually rise. Yes, making occasional
mistakes actually leads to better results over time!
Reference
1. Low, AA. (1997). Mental
health through will-training (3rd ed.). Glencoe, IL: Willett.
