Friday, April 8, 2011

Reading anxiety

The other day I had to read an important document. Well, “important” might be too strong of an adjective, but it was something I did need to read carefully. When I began the task my symptoms—an “old friend”—showed up. My vision became blurry and my breathing was shallow. I feared making a mistake, missing something important; my thinking was very insecure.

Then I began to spot that it is average to make mistakes—and it takes courage to make them. I reminded myself that it is not how we feel, but how we function that counts. Although my inclination was to not read this document, I had an obligation to do so, and I wasn’t going to let uncomfortable symptoms get in the way.

I muddled through the task. I didn’t feel great, but I endorsed myself. Before Recovery I would start a project like this; feel anxious; start over; feel more anxious; start over yet again—and something that should take ten minutes would take four torturous hours. Now, though, I have skills learned through Recovery training to deal with uncomfortable feelings and not let them run my life.

6 comments:

expwoman said...

I like the Recovery attitude to making mistakes as an average human thing. I would read every word of a book in case I missed something important--footnotes, dedication--but I'm practicing not reading every page, and not making the thought of missing something important freeze me in my tracks.

Ria said...

I really appreciate it when people try their best to cope up with something. I do agree with expwoman liking that Recovery attitude that you have been since that is just exactly how you do things when they just don't seem right.

Anxiety Relief said...

Its your own will power how to cope the situation & handle the problem.
nice sharing thanks for the post.

Anonymous said...

so proud of you,
I got points from your article,
I feel uncomfortable specialy when I am busy, It seems can not control something inside,
Like your power.
thanks!

Anonymous said...

I've been dealing with more or less the same symptoms for a long time. I don't know when it exactly started, but I do know how it starts every time. Your testimony was clear and concise, and I admire the way you're dealing with it. By constantly challenging your anxiety by moving outside your comfort zone, I am pretty sure you will overcome it.

Mohamed

Anonymous said...

Hi there,
I have been dealing with this issue for many many years, anxiety when it comes to reading. I feel it is worsening as the years go by.. it's good to know i'm not alone in my struggles and that there are people who are going through exactly what i'm going through because when i try to explain this to people around me it's something that they cannot understand..