Friday, January 2, 2009

Liking myself

I am a perfectionist. Some would see that as a valuable attribute, but it's a curse. I find faults everywhere, especially in myself. And when I see myself as flawed and not "good enough," I become extremely anxious.

So I'm redoubling my effort to love and accept myself. That sounds kinda cheesy, but I have to do this.

My counselor says learning to authentically value myself—including my "flaws"—will help reduce my anxiety. She asked me the other day to name three things I like about myself, and I struggled to come up with one. When she asked me to name three things I don't like about myself, it was hard to stop at three! Anxiety was at the top of that list.

Yet if I truly accept myself, "flaws" and all, perhaps I'll be less anxious going forward. I need to discover what I like about myself, as this, instead of my supposed "flaws," should be foremost in my mind.

3 comments:

Robert said...

It took me a long time - decades - to learn to accept myself, warts and all. I had been heartlessly teased throughout my childhood & felt unliked and unlikable. Luckily for me, now that I accept myself for who I am and learned even to like that person, I have been able to live a more fulfilling life. You're on the right track.

Good luck!

D said...

Thanks, Robert! I wonder what will be the longer journey: building my self-esteem or reducing my daily anxiety? I suspect the former.

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